There’s a pattern I’ve noticed among child care advocates. When something good happens in the system — a policy shifts, a letter gets delivered, a community shows up — and it lands on your birthday, you feel it differently. It’s not just good news. It feels like the universe is telling you: keep going.

My birthday

A while back, on my birthday, the mayor announced an expansion of the local area median income threshold to 200%. That’s a policy change that directly affects which families qualify for child care support. It was a big deal.

I didn’t post about it. I didn’t share it widely. But I carried it with me that whole day. I took it as a birthday gift — not from a person, but from the work itself. From the system finally moving in the right direction on the same day I happened to be born.

It wasn’t about me. But it felt like it was for me.

Nancy’s birthday

Today, I saw it happen again.

Nancy Wyatt is with the California Family Child Care Network. She’s around 80 years old. She still shows up. She still fights.

We’ve been working together on the 20% rule — the policy that says family child care providers cannot be away from their program for more than 20% of their operating hours. It limits providers’ ability to attend trainings, go to the doctor, take care of their families. We’ve been trying to change it for years — at least three or four since I became more involved with the Network.

Nancy has been going to the capital, delivering letters, asking legislators to act.

On our end locally, we’ve been collecting signatures and real stories from providers. I built a Jotform to make it easy for providers to participate — to learn about the issue, understand its impact, and share their voice. We made it available in English, Chinese, and Spanish. This morning, I shared it in our WeChat group, and 13 providers responded.

I messaged Nancy to let her know I’d forward what we collected. I also told her I needed to adjust the form — we’d been using the free version, which only allows 10 signature fields, so I had to restructure it to keep going.

Her response: “Thank you! That’s the best gift of my birthday!”

The pattern

You could feel her excitement through the message. Thirteen providers, from one local community, showing up with their voices — that was her birthday present. Not a card. Not a party. Letters and signatures.

This is the mentality of our community. The best birthday gift isn’t something you receive. It’s seeing the work move forward. It’s evidence that the fight matters, that people are still showing up.

Nancy is around 80 and still has the energy and passion to do this work — not for herself, but for the bigger community. That’s the kind of spirit I want to document and share. It’s also a reminder of what intrinsic motivation looks like in a field where the system rarely cultivates or rewards it.

Because when advocates celebrate birthdays this way, it tells you something about what drives them. It’s not personal gain. It’s a sense of hope — that the system can change, and that they’re part of why it will.

Your turn

I’d love to hear from you. Have you ever received a “birthday gift” like this — not a package or a card, but a moment where the work you care about moved forward, right on your day? A policy win, a community showing up, a message that reminded you why you do what you do?

If you have a story like that, I’d love to hear it. Share it with me — because these moments deserve to be remembered.